As I reflect upon 2009, it’s easier to use pictures, so here is 2009 in review…
MBA Recruiting
I don’t think I ever shared my full-time recruiting experience from last fall. I just came back from an MLT recruiting event, and I want to encourage all of you out there!! Rejection (or what feels like rejection) can be really tough to deal with, especially if you’ve had it pretty easy most of your life. For the most part, anything I applied to I received. Scholarships, jobs, school acceptances. I had never heard so many “No’s” in such a short time frame. I remember very clearly how I felt this time last year. I was a second year student in the MBA program at NYU Stern, and it was dry on campus. I did not receive a full-time offer during my summer internship for many reasons, and just about everybody who did, subsequently accepted. This made movement between companies almost impossible.
For an HR recruiter, perhaps the recruiting pool was so large and diverse they could select their dream candidate. Am I glad that for one company, I exceeded their requirements. But before I was extended and accepted that offer, many many interviews took place. The journey was loooooonng and emotional. I had a heads up that I was not going to receive my internship offer, actually. I received a call a few days before I heard the news from my boss. The campus recruiter reached out to me to ask me how my interview went (I will have to rewind and explain the circumstances under which I had an interview at the end of my internship. I started my internship in the 32nd week of pregnancy with Joshua, and he was born just shy of two weeks early, so because I’d left my biggest project dangling, I was scheduled to come back for a round of interviews at the end of the summer). I could tell by the direction and feel of the questions, she was probing, almost prying out a specific answer from me. She even had the gall to ask if I’d adequately slept the night before the interview. At this point I knew I’d bombed the interviews. After hanging up the phone, I shared the conversation with hubby and I came to the clear conclusion that I would not be receiving an offer.
I headed straight for the bathroom and took and long, hot shower and found myself sobbing because I had given that job 100%. I knew, without any doubt I had literally given it 100% and not even close to 99.999999%. There was not time at which I had faltered from my focus. I almost ran from meeting to meeting, and when I got back to my desk I responded to emails, ran to the bathroom, and then headed off to my next meeting. Everyday was like that. I didn’t pause for one single second. It was heartbreaking that I’d worked that hard and not seen any offer come through. It was hard for me, because I was so tired, and big and slow and I just wanted to be at home with my feet propped up on some sort of cushion. I wasn’t even that upset that I would not have the opportunity to work there, because I love my job right now, and I’m so glad that things worked out the way they did. I am 75% sure I would have accepted that offer if had existed. I know I would not have attended both diversity conferences (my current job resulted from a contact at the MLT alumni breakfast at NSHMBA) or recruited so intensely.
I was told that when the calibration meeting took place to determine who received offers, a few people really went to bat for me (thank you!), but in the end, if I had been extended an offer, I think my reputation would have been tainted by the fact that some managers needed to be convinced to bring me on board. My last Friday there, I was 3cm dilated and going from meeting to meeting and I would have stuck it out to very last second if I could have. I left my personal life at home, and never checked Facebook once at work. I was devoted, focused and determined, and that explains why I was so hurt. My best, my absolute very best was not enough.
When school started, I was concerned with how to handle inquiries about my internship. Classmates wanted to know who was working where, and I was embarrassed to share that I hadn’t closed the deal. Well, a nice size of us didn’t receive offers, and everyone was pretty sensitive about the topic so no one really pressed me for the details of my internship offer status and that was relieving. In fact, the maturity, concern and respect my Sternies showed was highly admirable. So many of us needed encouragement and support.
Full-time interviews started pretty soon. I made sure to attend both diversity conferences and followed up on leads coming out of both of them. I had interviews for marketing in just about every industry: CPG, finance, entertainment, technology, sports and even pharma. Pharma! What the hell was I thinking (the only industry I didn’t seriously pursue was luxury because I could not fake that funk for a million years). I could feel the pressure on my shoulders to get a job. Any job. I needed the confidence boost an offer gave. I wanted to know that somebody wanted to hire me. That somebody deemed me a strong enough candidate. To know that my name was at the top of a close list somewhere in the universe. To hear a “Yes!” you’re our top choice, instead of the taunting words, “The large number of inquiries we receive from highly qualified applicants has made our selection process a competitive one. Although your credentials are excellent, we regret that we are not able to proceed with your application for employment with [fill in the blank] at this time.”
Not making it to first rounds, and definitely not making it to second rounds is like getting dumped. Two companies were gracious enough to provide me feedback, which I found very helpful. Make sure to take advantage if the opportunity arises. I’d heard the gamut from some companies. As a classmate put it, companies were now handing out “runner-up” crowns. We were told things like, you are a really strong second candidate. We can only extend one offer, so our top choice has ten days to decide, and if they say no, it’s yours! I also heard, “if you don’t have anything by March, give us a call.” About five minutes before a second round interview, I was told “we don’t want to waste your time, and we don’t have an positions available right now, so may we reschedule for sometime in the spring, but only if you still need a job then.” Ughhhh, the craziness.
As the recruiting season began to come to a close and I still did not have an offer, I could feel fret trying to bubble inside me. I did not have a backup plan, because it would have consisted of more options I was not excited or genuinely passionate about. I came to b-school to transition to CPG marketing, and I didn’t want to give up on that dream. As December began, and I still did not have an offer, I set my hopes on hearing back from my (now current employer) top choice. I had entered the HR contact’s name and number into my cell phone, so there would not be ANY confusion about whose number showed up on the screen whenever he called with status updates.
The day he called, Kim, Gabi, Kareen and I were just leaving a splurge lunch at Max Brenners. We were walking along Broadway and I saw his name flash on the screen. It’s Jeff!!! I skipped a few paces ahead of the girls to take the call. When I hung up I turned and screamed!!!!! And so did they, which totally scared the closest strangers on the sidewalk. We had a mini celebration in front of Tisch and that was the last day of my full-time recruiting experience.
Pumping Buddies
I was totally spoiled at NYU. There was this single sized, carpeted locker room on fourth floor with a window, a cushiony chair, a bench for my pump, an outlet, and it locked from the inside. It was available pretty much whenever I wanted, because no one else was exclusively breastfeeding an infant while in their second year of business school.
At noon I would head up to the locker room and text Evelyn. She was my pumping buddy. I think every woman should have a pumping buddy. We would tell each other we were headed to pump and send each other messages throughout the day. This was huge for me! At NYU, business school kept moving whether I was at events or not, and it was so easy to feel like I was being left behind. At noon corporate presentations were being held, CEO’s were speaking at Lunch n Learns, or my girlfriends were going to Chipotle for a chicken burrito: all things I was missing because I had to pump.
Well, with my pumping buddy I was not alone. I had someone who understood how labor intensive pumping is. How you have to clean and pack and prepare for each meal you save when you’re away from your baby. My pumping buddy understood what a sacrifice it took to pump daily, but we also understood the reward – that when we returned home, we had milk enough to snuggle with our boys and nourish them from our bodies. The coolest thing was that we were pumping at exactly the same time. I knew that right at that moment, some hundreds of miles away in Chicago, someone else was pumping and thinking of their babies just like me.
Some days I was excited to pump only because Evelyn sent me a text message that she was going to pump. Some days it was motivation, because I knew that she was pumping for two, and that if she, as a first time mom could do it, I could definitely do it. Some days she would text and I wouldn’t reply because I was going later. Some days I would text, and she had pumped before me. But most days, we were in sync, supporting each other. I honestly believe I would have given up months sooner without Evelyn. I don’t think she understood how instrumental she was during the first weeks of pumping. She had been doing it all summer for her premie boys, but in September 2008 when school started, it was the first time I used the pump since Amari was 9 months old. I had savored in the freedom of nursing Joshua wherever I went. Something I had not had the confidence to do with Amari.
Evelyn, thank you. I did it with you.
10 Year High School Reunion
I just want to start off by saying that this past week has been real hard. I went to DC for the MLT MBAP event hosted by Booz Allen Hamilton, and it was great. I met with several fellows that are currently in the process of applying to business school. A few fellows were married, and wanted to get the scoop on what it was like being pregnant in business school, and it was totally easy compared to this!
Well, I mean, not totally easy, but doable. In fact, a classmate of mine, Diana Gonzalez, has just launched a social networking platform for MBA mamas, Top MBA Mom, which makes me say ‘now, why didn’t I think of that?’ Technically, me and few other mamas who had babies in b-school thought it would be a great idea, but none of us actually followed through on the idea, so I’m really proud of Diana!
But really, working fulltime is like a marathon and a sprint all at the same time. In the mornings, I try to get ready before the boys interrupt me, and then the sprint begins. Getting them dressed and packing their bag with extra diapers, pullups, clean sheets and their lunch boxes all of sudden feels so overwhelming when I just want to get out of the door so I can beat the traffic. The marathon kicks in at daycare when I’m setting them up with breakfast, and filling out their daily sheets, and telling their teachers how the morning went so far. Sometimes, I change Joshy’s crib sheet, sometimes I don’t. Most days I do Amari’s hair before we leave the house and I try to make it a point to not have snotty nosed kids, but this morning it just was not happening. And oh what joy! I totally forgot today was picture day.
So, I’m saying all this to say, that’s why its been pretty quiet on the blog front. I’ve been thinking about all the things I wanted to write, but haven’t found the time or energy to sit down and finish a post. The past few weeks have been especially hectic because hubby has been putting in the last hours of studying for his series 7 exam which took place this morning.
Have I ever bragged about how smart that man is ? I mean, he is out of control intelligent. He actually learned in school, instead of memorizing just to pass a test. He cares about knowledge, and I believe, enjoys learning. Hubby not only passed, but he received the second highest score in his class. He was aiming for a 98, but a 90 will do just find thank you. I am so proud of you, babe.
Now, that the test is over things will be a little more sane. In fact, I can finally finish this post about my ten year high school reunion, which occurred a few weeks ago!
I went to Minnesota for my reunion (with the boys sans daddy – and I’ll have to blog about traveling solo later), but it was a great trip. I saw classmates from Breck School that I had not seen in literally ten years. I am what you call a ‘lifer.’ I attended Breck for fifteen years, from the time I was three, starting in preschool, all the way through my senior year in high school. I had my trepidations about seeing my classmates, but I was pleasantly surprised.
Molly M, Heather S, Liz T, Paris and Michael P — You made my reunion. I bonded with old classmates who are now moms, which was so weird! What was also weird was seeing a classmate who was a girl in high school, who is now a boy. Go figure! But really, sharing mommy experiences with people I’ve know since I was three was a whole new experience for me. Some people, I was really close with in high school I’ve really grown a part from now. For some people, our paths have totally separated, probably for the better. Some people were still doing school age things, like getting so drunk they could hardly talk. And that was weird, too, because here I am thinking, I’m 29 and mom to two human beings. You will not find me plastered at my high school reunion. But anyway, I really enjoyed you guys, and I can’t wait until the next one!
Our MLT
On July 22 the second installment of CNN’s Black in America special aired. The documentary is very dear to my heart because Management Leadership for Tomorrow, one of the four organizations featured, has done sooooo much for us. Hubby and I were introduced to the organization through my mentor at General Mills, and we applied for the MBA Preparation program in 2005. The application process, at the time, was less stringent than it is today, requiring four essays, and a practice GMAT score. Thankfully, we were admitted and commenced the business school application preparation process in March of 2006.
The MBA Prep program consisted of three seminars, where we visited Michigan State’s Broad School of Management, NYU Stern School of Business and UPenn – Wharton. At each seminar we focused on a different aspect of the application. At the first seminar we spent a great deal of time defining our passions and answering key questions about our future, our goals and our career interests. At the second seminar, we fell in love with NYU thanks to JKap and the rest of the admissions crew. We participated in ’speed networking,’ very similar to speed dating, but imagine replacing your future mate with a top 20 business school admissions officer instead. I received great feedback that day which I incorporated into my essays. The third seminar in Philly helped us to wrap up the loose ends to our answers about ‘Why is now the right time to pursue an MBA?’
Shortly after we submitted our applications, we found out we were expecting. This was great news because just three months prior we experienced our first (of two) miscarriages. I had endometriosis removed in 2003, so I was glad when we were able to conceive again. At the first seminar I was five months pregnant with Amari, and then nine months pregnant at the second seminar in July. I was excited to be going through the process with my husband right there, and the MBAP program had introduced us to 200 new aunties and uncles for Amari
Just six weeks after Amari was born the third seminar was held in Philly. This was perfect for us because we lived fifteen minutes away and did not have to travel by plane with an infant and all the items that come with an infant (i.e. stroller, car seat, bottle warmer, diapers, wipes, thousands of changes of clothes, diapers). By then Hubby’s mom had arrived to help us care for the little one. Her arrival and stay was much needed, as I was still studying for the GMAT. Hubby had knocked out a great score on the first go. He was also way more diligent than I was at studying. Earlier that year, from February through May, we took a GMAT Prep course with Akil at Bell Curves in Manhattan. Hubby came home every night after work and studied for hours, while I studied for about thirty minutes and then found some pregnancy related excuse to go to bed early.
Because I was on maternity leave, it became increasingly easy to attend the Prospective Student events at the schools at which we chose to apply. We attended Explore Wharton, the Duke MBA Workshop and Discover Stern. All three were diversity student events. We saw many MLT faces at these events, which helped us to feel comfortable in the new MBA environment. After we clicked submit on our three applications (we applied to NYU through the Consortium), the interviews began. We traveled back to NYU for Perspectives Weekend. It was easy going to Philly for our Wharton interviews, and we had already interviewed at Duke during the MBA workshop. We submitted all the applications the day they were due. Originally, we planned to submit during the first round deadlines, but once your MLTcoach gives you back your essays with so much feedback to incorporate, even making second rounds was aggressive.
MLT was so great for us because it gave us unique, one on one coaching and feedback. My story was very different from hubby’s, so my application weaknesses were also very different than his. My background was engineering within the consumer packaged goods industry (CPG), and he came from information technology within the financial services industry. I needed to answer the questions “Why did I want to be a brand manager? How did I know this was right for me? Was this a good fit?” I was able to answer these questions and present my concise, yet compelling story of why the business school transition was necessary for my professional goals, and yet beneficial for me and my prospective school. In my essays, I vowed to make the business school environment a better place for student-parents. I held true to these words and enriched the student body population as president and webmaster of the NYU Students with Children Club.
Hubby said the early exposure to the admissions officers and recruiters at target firms was critical to his success. Making points of contact so early in the process helped him figure out where he was weak, while identifying the skills that recruiters sought and honing those skills. I loved the program because it created structure around a nebulous process. I had fire under my tush to be ready to dig deep and study for the GMAT. It was tough finding time while I was still working full-time, and it was even tougher when I had a newborn sleeping on my arm.
At the conclusion of the MBAP program we attended boot camp. It was a week long process, and my mother and father were gracious enough to care for Amari in Minnesota. If you think about the logistics of getting a 10 month old to Minnesota, it meant that my dad flew to New Jersey just to pick him up and carry him back. He said that going through security everyone extended a helping hand because this grandpa was a novice in traveling with an infant.
Being an MLT alumna has been extremely fulfilling for me. This program equipped me with a set of business soft skills that I used throughout my two years at Stern, and since I cannot yet give to the organization financially they way I want to, I give them my time in the form of volunteering. Can you imagine having a step by step how-to guide, a one-on-one coach giving personalized direction, and the power of a 1700+ and growing alumni network at your disposal while you applied to business school?
My favorite aspects of the MBA Preparation program was the emphasis on branding. I knew as a future marketer, that learning about the 4P’s and 3C’s would help me structure a marketing case analysis, but in terms of my personal brand and representing MLT’s brand, that was much more powerful. I actually made time to think about how I am perceived professionally, versus how I see myself and how I want to be received. I had to answer tough questions about what was I really, REALLY passionate about? Did I need an MBA to get there? And if so, was it worth the sacrifice of my time and energy to complete the application process with 200 other people? In some ways MBAP was like being in school again. Monthly coach calls, monthly assignments, practice GMAT exams, essays to write… the list goes on.
Yes, it was absolutely, positively worth it! The relationships with my classmates, other business school peers, school administrators, and corporate recruiters were all initiated through MLT. I even received my full-time job offer through an introduction at an MLT alumni breakfast. I give a full 100% endorsement of the program. It was a wonderful eighteen months, which I will benefit from for probably eighteen years and hopefully longer.
Thank you John, Gwen, Rodney, Martene, Holly and hubby: all of my coaches!
