My boys were not the multitudes of Zion in Judea, but they were darn cute today. On the way to and from church, we explained what Palm Sunday and Easter are. It really takes a good understanding of Christianity to break down the explanation of the resurrection of Jesus Christ to a four year-old. We tried and did our best, Lord. Gadget was very receptive to our words, although he asked some tough questions. “How is Jesus is God? What is a resurrection?” I thank God that Hubby and I can teach our boys about the Lord.

Old things pass away and all things become renewed!

I passed the place, because I was imagining a larger facility, based on the website. I soon realized they had a mega church location about half an hour away, but I was at basically the satellite location. The sanctuary was clean and modern. The praise team was already playing. The sounds consisted of a few guitars, drums and a keyboard. There was not the same flat notes and syncopation I’m used to in the Baptist church, but I kept my mind open. After the opening prayer everyone greeted each other. People walk around the church and shook my hand and introduced themselves. One of the things you can tell right away is how pretentious the members are, and this church extended their love immediately.

Before the sermon, the pastor asked the families who had attended the Saturday night marriage session to reflect their thoughts on it. I can honestly say that hubby and I are always game for marriage advice, but today I was especially prime for a word from God concerning the institution of marriage. I just saw Pelham 123, and Walter Garber (Denzel) is telling the subway hijacker, Ryder (John Travolta), that he accepted a bribe of $35,000 to help pay for his kids’ college tuition. Ryder asks how Garber’s wife responded, and Garber answers that she was angry but she eventually understood. Ryder says “that’s love,” and Garber, corrects him and says, “No, that’s marriage. That’s different.” It’s clear that Garber’s wife was serious when she said for better or for worse, because many people would have considered a felony grounds for divorce. There are sacrifices and compromises made and exchanged during marriage, and every once and while a revival is needed.

I am writing all of this because several of my friends are going through divorce right now, and it is by the grace of God our marriage has made it this far. I don’t know how to comfort them, other than to tell them I’m praying for them. Some circumstances have been more grim than others. One friend, her husband beat her and she and their one year old son kicked him out. Another, my best friend, asked her husband to move out after more than five years and twin boys. The lastest separation was a husband kicking his wife out, and she’s pregnant with his fourth child. Can you imagine what you would do? You eagerly plan for a union together, a life, ’til death do you part, and then find yourself homeless, or homeless and pregnant, or having a home and children and no father to interact with on a daily basis.

So today was prayer was that God would revive my heart. I asked him to forgive me for my sins, and to remove the spirits of selfishness and pride. I confessed that I love my husband. I am no longer waiting for God to change him. I truly believed that if hubby would just speak MY love language, phsyical touch and acts of service, that I would be on cloud nine 24/7. Even though hubby’s languages are quality time and physical touch as well, we speak two completely different dialects of the same language. I looove PDA, and hubby loves… well you know. Now, I am ready to change. The coolest part of the service was learning that there is a couples session every other Saturday, and that they are currently reading the Five Love Languages! I hope to return one day, as a family. I felt the word of God speak directly to me today, and I am not waiting. I immediately repented and changed course. For all of my married friends out there, today the word I heard was revive your heart, so revive it brother and sisters!

How have you handled the topic or plan to handle the topic if it is even a topic at all? Did you allow trick or treating? Do/did you allow your child to dress up but not trick or treat? How do/did you explain it? Did you take your children to a church event with similar activities? I would love your feedback/thoughts!

We had lunch today with one of hubby’s dearest friends, Alvin, and Alvin’s girlfriend. The couple has been dating for just over a year, and it reminded me of us back in the day. Back in the day when we were swiftly heading down the endorphin waxed slope that ended in marriage. For us, we met in March of 2002, and in March of 2004 we were engaged, two years to the day that we met. Hubby had this requirement that we had to court for two cycles of all the seasons. He had this theory that people act differently throughout the seasons, let’s says for example, if you get depressed during the winter time, so he observed me throughout all these environments.

The goal of all of this is to make sure that your potential future spouse doesn’t become a vampire when you’re not looking, but just between June 10-15th. The thing is, no amount of time can predict exactly how your lifelong mate will act in different environments. Let’s take for example business school. I definitely thought I knew what was coming for our marriage when we entered NYU Stern’s fulltime MBA program. I naively concluded that it would be just like our undergraduate experience. We were both Electrical Engineering majors at Georgia Tech throughout our entire courtship, so I had this MBA thing in the bag.

Ha, ha, ha. Spending first semester pregnant and at home with a one-year old boy while my husband attending DAILY recruiting events that ended at 10PM at the earliest was not quite my idea of going to business school TOGETHER. Yes, we took classes in the same building, but we were rarely in each other’s classes. Yes, we tried to travel to and from school together, but that meant coordinating ALL of our extracurricular activities, and that wasn’t happening. All in all, it felt great to know that hubby was somewhere in Kaufman with me, but it was not like at Georgia Tech.

The result was a lot of unmet expectations. I say all of this in hopes that the next married couple who attends b-school at the same time will not fall into the pit of uncommunication (apparently that’s not a word). It is a deep, deep pit that is lined with resentment and bitterness if you remain trapped inside. I don’t think we fell really deep into this pit, but we were down deep enough that we, again, realized that business school, just like everything else was only possible with God, prayer, supplication and all the other things Jesus needed in the wilderness.

Tonight Amari and I attended Vacation Bible School. Now, it has been YEARS since I attended VBS. It definitely had to have been in the 80s. This was a special event for me, to see my son in front of a church body presenting. As a young girl, I gained confidence from the many activities the black church promotes. I probably gave my first public speech in the church, and had a loving audience to affirm and celebrate my accomplishments. Thus, it was like coming full circle seeing my offspring stand in front of Christians and tell about the goodness of God.

I sat in the “Progressive Adults” class (a respectful term for young adults). We studied the scripture Luke 5: 18-26, and conversed about forgiveness and deliverance. Whoa! It was deep. Our teacher was awesome, and was well versed in life and scripture. He shared personal anectdotes that were grounded in scripture. He spoke about how when we forgive, we open up the doors and release for God to deliver us. He asked us to think if there was anything that we wanted or needed, and if it was related to someone whom we haven’t forgiven. I immediately knew who I needed to forgive.  The problem is my flesh… I think the enemy wants me to doubt that I can actually forgive for real, from my heart, and just blot it out as if it never existed. I believe I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Vacation Bible School was refreshing. I knew I wanted to spend my time off this summer engrossed in somebody’s church, and I am glad I am finally where I need to be.

Hubby was raised Catholic, and I, Baptist. I was never attached to a specific denomination within Christianity, so when I entered College, I began attending New Life International Family Church, now in Lithonia, GA, which is non-denominational (but feels more Pentecostal!). I was introduced to the church through the Atlanta University Center Gospel Choir, also called New Life. In March of 2000, I attended a spring break gospel tour with the choir, and re-dedicated my life to Christ (I did initially when I was eight, but never really walked the walk).

After I returned from the tour, I had a passion for Christ that I had never known. I joined the New Life (the church), and was a faithful member until I moved away from Atlanta after graduation in 2004. Hubby and I married in December of 2004, and moved to Mount Laurel, NJ. There, we attented The Catholic Church of St. Mary’s in Cherry Hill, NJ. It was a wonderful congregation (or parrish, as they call it).

So, now we attend Notre Dame in Harlem, as well as All Saints, which has an excellent music ministry. We decided to raise our children Catholic, so we all attend church together. It has been a challenge bringing two faiths together, but it can be done.