I Just Realized… | spelhouseLove

I Just Realized…

As hubby and I were talking yesterday, I realized what a gamble he took when marrying me. Being a father has been at the top of his list of life goals for a long time, and I can’t see him being truly happy and fulfilled without children, and especially a son, to raise in his image.

When hubby and I were courting, I had some of the typical female issues, like cramps and the like. My mother strongly pushed me to have exploratory surgery, because she was convinced I had endometriosis. I felt as though that was a big jump to make. It was like when the Lion is hungry, instead of just pointing at the food item he wants, he screams like his last meal was in 1943. At the time, surgery was a HUGE deal to me. As a matter of fact, this was the first (of many subsequent) surgeries, and I was rightfully cautious and slow with agreeing to lie down and let someone slice me open just to see what I looked like on the inside.

I knew a lot of friends that had it rough every 28 or so days, and I thought that was just a part of life as a woman. Well, my mother knew, with a sixth sense conviction, that the pain I was experiencing was not normal. She did not want me to suffer the emotional tornado of infertility issues. So, after receiving confirmation from God that surgery was indeed the right way to go and necessary, I agreed to have laparoscopic surgery.

You know how people say that moms are always right? Well, my mom was spot on like a ladybug. I had moderate endometriosis which was causing my pain. Now, the thing about surgery, any kind of surgery, even the same day, minimally invasive, small procedures that they try to minimize as though you are getting your finger pricked, ARE BIG DEALS. You know its a big deal because because of all the waivers and legal documents that you sign before they open you up.

The biggest “complication” I remember on my medical waiver (obviously, other than death), was risk of hysterectomy. Now, I was 22 when I had this surgery. Hopefully, I had a loooong life full of reproductive opportunities in front of me at that age, but you can’t naturally reproduce without all your lady parts. So, seeing that if something went wrong, like massive internal bleeding, removing something that would prevent hubby and I from ever having kids the natural way was a gargantuan deal.

So, the other day, I just realized that when hubby married me, there was a possibility that we could never have children the old fashioned way. And we want to have lots of children the old fashioned way. He married me in spite of these issues, and that’s pretty cool.

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Hi. I live in North Texas with God, my man, my boys, and a sweet baby girl.
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