Toots or get off the pot | spelhouseLove

Toots or get off the pot

I must start off by saying that my husband brings a whole new language into our home. During my first visit to Trinidad in 2002, I learned about the book, Cote Ci Cote La, which “is an entertaining and educational illustrated dictionary that is the key to understanding the spoken dialect of Trinidad and Tobago.” My favorite words and phrases in the book are gyurl (which is pronounced “ghial”) and cuttin style. He has terms for everyday nouns that I have included in my speech after listening to him over the past seven years. For example, he calls a plane an airbus, and lotion cream, and shorts “short pants” and so one. So, when I started referring to going #2 as toots, it just seems normal. Now, on with the story…

Every night, after we have safely tucked in Gadget to bed, the slew of excuses begin. They start off petty, “I need a hug, I didn’t kiss daddy.” They progress to action items for us, such as “Read it again,” or “I want my water!” The final string, and his most desperate, yet effective way to get out of bed is to say he has to go to the bathroom. He says he has to toots, and then sits on the toilet for five minutes, says its not coming down and then goes back to bed. This cycle repeats two or three times, until finally last night I heard myself say “toots or get off the pot!”

Eventually, he did NOT go to the bathroom- it was all a guise. He complained about monsters in his room and requested that the light stay on, and finally, finally stayed in his bed.

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Hi. I live in North Texas with God, my man, my boys, and a sweet baby girl.
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